Sticky Situation

hat sticker
For real.

I’m getting old. I know this because the trends are passing me by at lightspeed. The other day at work, a boy of about thirteen came up to the counter with his mom and grandma to buy a DC logo baseball cap.  As I was trying to hide my shock and disgust at the hat’s $60 price tag, he told me that he didn’t need a bag. I cut the tags off of his overpriced accessory and went to peel the shiny sticker off of the brim.

Panic ensued.

“Oh, no, he needs that sticker!” said Grandma.

“Don’t peel that off!” said Mom.

Son just stood at the counter, looking terrified.

I deftly smoothed the sticker back onto the brim of the hat. Good as new. Disaster averted. Everyone let out their collective breath and we all went on with our lives.

I told this story to my coworkers, who all got a good laugh out of it. When did stickers become fashionable? Why is it crucial for a new hat to retain the proof that it is 7 3/8″ in size? It makes me lose heart in the kids of today. Take a stand. Peel off the sticker.

And while you’re at it, please, please wear your hat with the brim over your forehead. And speaking of the brim – bend it a little. Flat brims do no one any favors.

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